I thought a lot about this weekend and the mystery of my diet soda addiction. I realize there is a chemical component to it, with caffeine playing a role as an addictive substance of sorts, but I couldn’t help but feel there is less of a drug-like addiction and more of a behavioral problem attached to it. So, I begin thinking about when and under what circumstances I have been drinking soda and when it gets out of control.

It really didn’t take long for me to realize that having given up carbohydrate heavy meals, I have quickly replaced them with diet soda. At first, I gave up drinking it all together but then realized any time I was in a restaurant I would need something besides the filthy tap water they offer to drink. And that is where it began again, just a casual soda at lunch. Here I am noticing two bad behaviors, both of which are correctable.

The first behavior is much like someone abandoning their diet or weight loss program entirely after “cheating” one time, using the justification of “well, since I just cheated and ruined everything, I might as well give up and over-indulge…” The same sort of process has been going on with diet soda for me…somewhere in the back of my mind a little light went on that told me that “Hey, since you have a casual diet soda at lunch once in a while, you might as well drink it all the time!” Well, we all know this isn’t a good way to think about anything that goes in our mouth whether it be diet soda or a cheeseburger. Moderation is key to any healthy lifestyle and this sort of thinking is the opposite of moderation, so I have taken a key point of change for my new lifestyle from this thought process.

The second behavior is just as detrimental as the first as far as losing weight and keeping it off goes and that is rewards. I realize now that I treat food as a reward. It could be to celebrate something, to mourn something or just to reach a “check point” during my day, either way I am looking at food as a reward of sorts. Even following the Medifast Program closely, I realize that I treat my Lean & Green Meal as a “reward” instead of just a meal during my day. Diet soda is a killer in the same way…I realized that all last week I had allowed myself to have a diet soda with my lunch and therefore was double re-enforcing this idea that my Lean & Green was a reward (as was the soda).

I use the word “reward” in a very general sense to indicate something that I pay myself with. Food and drink is the currency of my life and has been feeding my greedy body for years. I need to disassociate myself from this type of thinking and treat food and drink as exactly what it is…a necessity of life, a passing habit throughout the day. By not treating a meal as this built up pay-off, I can keep myself from over-eating.

I know from some of the comments left on previous posts that some folks think I over-think this whole process and perhaps I do, however as I have stated previously I am in this for a life change, not just to drop some pounds for the summer. If I don’t take the time to think about how I look at food and drinks and how I behave in relation to them I will never be able to maintain a stable weight. I would say that understand yourself and the way you interact with food is the key to life long health. I can point out a couple of things to re-enforce this idea.

First, look at the overall failure rates for some diets. Sure, they work at first to help you drop a bunch of weight, but sooner or later you find the weight back again. For those of you looking to start Medifast or currently on Medifast how many of you are repeat weight loss participants? Second, look at folks who do surgery as a weight loss alternative. It works for a while, but I have known 3 people that have had the bypass surgery and within 2 years had gained some or all of the weight back. None of them followed the recommended eating habits or diets outlined by their doctors and they were right back at fat, but this time with scars and permanent changes to their bodies.

In short, I am lamenting over this a lot to help me come to some sort of understanding with my psyche over what I can and can’t eat, how much I should eat and how often. The Medifast Program is giving me great guidelines for being successful in those areas, but it is up to me to understand the “whys” behind them. It is up to me to remain positive and to change my thinking about what I put in my mouth day to day.

Whew… that was quite a rant, sorry about that!